Tuesday, October 6, 2009

It's Raining, It's Pouring I'm Not Snoring, But I am Old

So it's been one of those days where I have zero self confidence, feel fat, am tired, so not motivated to do anything, just want to crawl up in bed and sleep the day away, depressed, moody, want to be left alone, and yet I am reminded that I have a child to look after, I have to provide for my family (go to work), keep pushing myself even if I no energy, I have to keep positive or else I will slip away into the dark hole that eats people alive!

I know why am I sharing this, because I believe we all have days where we are forced to elivate ourselves to a level past feeling so that our flesh doesn't rob us of our spiritual blesing! I had to do that today...and while I found my refeshing not so much in the word of God but in a computer game, I have to say that I was indeed refreshed...Not everything we do has to be so spiritual that it makes us become a space cadet. What I needed wasn't a spirtual boost as much as a physical boost. Yeah sure, I have been going to the gym, working, and being active with my daughter but sometimes it goes deeper than that physically.

Saturday night I went bowling and had a blast, the person I went with opened my eyes to somethings while we chatted. Let's just say the conversation after bowling while we drove around gave me another one of what I call "self examination" times....I realized why I am so hesitant to enter a new relationship or try to make a relationship with one of the guys already in my life....I look forward to more bowling times. Despite the competive bowling this person did I was indeed having fun! lol

I went today to look for a halloween costume for me and my daughter. I know we don't so much celebrate as we do enjoy dressing up. I decided I am going to go biker, goth, emo. I bought a few accesories, I have the wigs already, I just need the tattoos and piercings! Which I will get before the the 31st. As far as my little one, I have a few ideas in mind I just need to see which one she likes the best!

I know some of you are reading this and have already condemned me for even entertaining the idea of halloween but get over it.....show me in the Bible where it is wrong to dress up and have a fun time.....I know shun the whole appearance of evil....but really what is evil about dressing up in costumes that are G-RATED???

anyway, enough rambling, I am off to spend time with little ma'ma since she just got home from gymnastics!

*chow*